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Pay What Now?
Outro
Hearing the music
When to quit
I am not as other men
Tonight I was funny
Attack of the Drones
Notes on your set
Why Pissing off a Fellow Comedian was Fun
Can I Just Say That iPads are Lame

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Saturday, March 30

Wake up, do some painting, some grouting, then gardening, shopping, cleaning out the car, recompiling a Linux Kernerl, cleaning the house and top it all off with making a pizza, from scratch, with an egg on the top...

That's what I call a good Friday!

Friday, March 29

Weird Al Yankovic deserves another mention - his songs have been funny to me for ages, but his videos are a revelation. Check them out if you can - especially his "Jurassic Park", which is a good pastiche of the impenetrable "MacArthur Park"... oh yes, and don't shy from his "Spy Hard" video - the theme tune to the film of the same name, which is in the true vein of the bond theme - both in terms of audio AND visuals.

Thursday, March 28

Go to bed Ashley! I must sleep... but I have enjoyed the Weird Al Yankovic tribute to Star Wars Episode 1... you have got to see it!

I found this very funny - the "Spice Guys" and "Say you'll bring beer". It's a six and a half minute video which does a "Full Monty" style make-over of some men to make them serious competitors for the Spice Girls... their video, shot incredible well, in the desert, is very comical!

Tuesday, March 26

Mmmm broadband...

The hardest bit, now, is going to be thinking of something to say - the rate at which I can learn new things is far greater than the rate I can write about them. It may only be ten times faster than my previous connection, but this Telewest broadband has bowled me over.

I've even managed to get my firewall working.

Thursday, March 21

I wonder how much it takes to get a higher position on the links list on Mal's site.

Tonight, I watched Ms Jolie in Tomb Raider. It reminded me, in some obscure way, of a cool film I saw a long time ago, called The Girl, The Gold Watch and Everything. I prefer the second film to the first in many ways, but a DVD of Ms Jolie strutting her stuff is nothing to be sniffed at.

Tuesday, March 19

An apostrophe error by the tax man... what delight.

I could not help but laugh my backside off when I heard The Girl with Emphyzema, which is, if it's not too obvious, a spoof of The Girl From Ipanema.

Monday, March 18

Someone remind me to vent about Boots and their advantage point. And I must wander down Gosforth High Street with a digital camera. For now, let's look at an author who is not called Iris.

Fun incredible links:
  • A haiku to be read a couple of times over

  • Last week's weblog entries - quite a lot of content recently

  • A pointless letter to the makers of Branston!

  • Weep again at the loss of Fawlty Towers' location
What a site this is (perhaps I'm being a little sarcastic here - or is it ironic?).

Saturday, March 16

Space station oddity - one of the funniest things I've heard in ages, and it's about as funny as the Star Wars Cantina.

Maybe I'm just cynical, but I have to look at the office situation in detail today - there are things which I need to get off my chest (and I don't just mean the excess areas of blubber). In typical backlash style, I could not help but mention the supermarket in the above article.

Looking back a year, I was waxing lyrical on various subjects, including the braindead on today's quiz shows. It's time to shout at the TV! Plus, I had fun with some charity bag packers and their appalling spelling. The internet is a wonderful place - I've recently been asked more about this one-year old article; there's actually someone out there who cares enough to try to find out who was responsible for the problem and who it was that was so apathetic about it when I approached them in store... what on earth was that reader searching for when they hit my article?

Friday, March 15

Bought a new CD today. Nuff said!

Thursday, March 14

Having just seen Mad Donna's "The Wheels on the Bus" video, I found the web site www.videoparodies.com where this video, and others, are linked. In particular Ms Spears' "Oops I farted again" is a favourite!

On this site, a couple of updates, a wee comment on why I think people hate Microsoft, and a dig through the archives reveals a letter to Rob.

Tuesday, March 12

A couple of updates today. We have a letter I dug up from 1999 to a thorough job-seeker. PLUS there are now two more episodes in my holiday story - catch Episodes 14 and 15.

Monday, March 11

It seems that some apostrophe confusion surround Mrs V. Beckham. Her heart may well have a mind of its own, but I think her fans may have punctuation rules of their own... this is a picture from a fan site of Mrs B - I'm not sure, yet, whether the punctuation came from the fan or the TV show (Pepsi Chart) that the image was grabbed from...

When getting a letter back from Matthew seemed as easy as getting blood from a stone, I tried to force his hand.

Thursday, March 7

Drilling.... grr!

Woohoo - we're going to Dublin too. No, Mal, I'm not copying you... honest!

For the update freaks, here is where to find the latest article - it's another member of the letters section: this one is to Lucy.

Tuesday, March 5

I know at least one person who will be freaked out by Rids.com.

Finding some entertainment by reading through old letters on my hard disk, I've decided to open a new section. Incredible Letters is where you will find some of my epistles, slightly edited, but basically in the manner they left my fingers. Hopefully this section will come to contain some of my more fun writings, rather than the more acrid style of correspondance often found on backlash.

Talking of letters of complaint, I found a gem of a letter hiding on my hard disk - it's a complaint to British Gas. I had clearly forgotten to take any tact or diplomacy pills that day!

Monday, March 4

An hour queuing for match tickets. I would never have believed I'd find myself doing that. The match ticket queue is a fantastic place to find out about today's society. Apparently, being in a member of today's society involves learning how to spit in a variety of interesting ways, and being given time out of school to hang around the football ground.

I've said it before and I'll say it again: egg on pizza - it works! You crack open an egg into the centre of your pizza before oven-baking it (I oven bake a pizza for about 15-20 minutes). The baked egg is a joy to eat - it is all fluffy and light... where the albumen and mozzarella meet, it's heavenly!

Saturday, March 2

I now have a jazz-version of the Dr Who theme running round my head, courtesy of Bill Bailey. Unfortunately, this track is not downloadable from his site, but other songs are!

Friday, March 1

We went to see a film called "Don't Say A Word" tonight. I also started reading a book called "Tell Noone". People are so secretive these days!

It seems that I've had my first personal response to an article. The original article in apostrophell has resulted in a follow up, containing an email from someone within the company I criticised. It's all positive and healthy debate and it's what the internet is all about.

In another one of my funny moods, I've turned a book review into an excuse to tell a sob-story about being roughed up as a child. 1 2 3... aaaah!

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